Enzoy's Empty Space ...

전에 REAL STORIES OF THE NON-TECHNICALLY INCLINED 라는 실화 우스개 모음 (기계를 기술적으로 이해하지 않고 있는 사용자들의 해프닝)을 읽다가 영어 실력이 안되서 잘 이해하지 못한 글이 있었어요. 바로 Auto Cruise, Cruise Control 에 관한 것이었는데 나중에야 누구한테 물어보고선 이해를 했답니다.

함께 볼수 있는 비슷한 이야기도 있음. 해석은 나중에 시간되는대로 하겠음nnn

REAL STORIES OF THE NON-TECHNICALLY INCLINED
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I worked with an individual who plugged their power strip back into itself and for the life of them could not understand why their computer would not turn on.
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1st Person:   "Do you know anything about this fax-machine?"
2nd Person:   "A little. What's wrong?"
1st Person:   "Well, I sent a fax, and the recipient called back to say all she received was a cover-sheet and a blank page. I tried it again, and the same thing happened."
2nd Person:   "How did you load the sheet?"
1st Person:   "It's a pretty sensitive memo, and I didn't want anyone else to read it by accident, so I folded it so only the recipient would open it and read it."
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I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car.
"Do you need some help?" I asked.
She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the battery in this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store)   would have a battery for this?"
"Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?" I asked.
"No, just this remote 'thingy,'" she answered, handing it and the car keys to me.
As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied,
"Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries...it's a long walk."     
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Tech Support:   "What does the screen say now."
Person: "It says, 'Hit ENTER when ready'."
Tech Support:   "Well?"
Person:     "How do I know when it's ready?"     
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A man called his car insurance company to tell them to change his address from Texas to Vermont.
The woman who took the call asked where Vermont was. As he tried to explain, she interrupted and said,
"Look, I'm not stupid or anything, but what state is it in?"
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Several years ago we had an intern who was none too swift. One day he was typing and turned to a secretary and said,
"I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?"
"Just use copier machine paper," she told him.
With that, the intern took his last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five blank copies.
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I was working the help desk. One day one of the computer operators called me and asked if anything "bad" would happen if she dropped coins into the openings of her PC.
I asked her if this was something she was thinking of doing.
She said, "never mind" and hung up.
So I got out my trusty tool kit and paid her a visit. I opened her CPU case and sure enough, there was 40 cents.
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One of our servers crashed. I was watching our new system administrator trying to restore it.
He inserted a CD and needed to type a path name to a directory named "i386."
He started to type it and paused, asking me, "Where's the key for that line thing?"
I asked what he was talking about, and he said, "You know, that one that looks like an upside-down exclamation mark."
I replied, "You mean the letter "i"?" and he said,
"Yeah, that's it!"
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This person had a broken lamp which he wanted to discard.
Unfortunately, the power cord ran under his refrigerator, making it impossible to move the lamp while the cord was attached.
He decided to cut the   cord, since the lamp was unusable anyway. He didn't remember to unplug   it first.
I found him in the hallway rolling back and forth.
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I was in a car dealership a while ago when a large motor home was towed into the garage.
The front of the vehicle was in dire need of repair and the whole thing generally looked like an extra in "Twister."
I asked the manager what had happened. He told me that the driver had set the cruise control, then went in back to make a sandwich.
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I called a company and asked to speak to Bob. The person who answered said, "Bob is on vacation. Would you like to hold?"
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One secretary called Compuserve customer support (CS) hotline to say that even though she did what the software told her to do, it didn't seem to work. CS asked her about the situation in detail. The error message was : "Type mismatch."
The secretary said that when she saw this message, she typed "mismatch" several times, but didn't help.
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I rented a movie from Blockbuster. Before the movie begins a message comes on the screen saying,
"This movie has been altered to fit your television screen."
Comment from person: "How do they know what size screen I   have?"
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킥킥.. 스타트랙의 앤터프라이즈호라도 몰고 있는줄 알았나봐요.

JW (1998/10/12,18:4)

영어에 약해서... 쩝.
> Vermont가 주이름인가요? Texas와 무슨 관계???
> CPU case가 뭘 말하는건지, CPU 포장???
설명 좀 부탁합니다.

enzoy (1998/10/12,19:48)

엇, 저한테 물어보신거? 음.. 저도 이 얘기중에 깨끗하게 이해가 안가는 것들 많아요.. 크루즈 콘트롤같은건 첨엔 전혀 뭔소린지 몰랐고.. (저역시 영어가 좀...) Bob의 휴가에 관한 얘기, 버몬트의 얘기도 제가 제대로 이해하고 웃은것인지 자신 없구요.
o. 버몬트 얘기: 여자가 "제가 바본줄 알아요? 전 버몬트가 어느 주 안에 있냐고 묻는 거라구요"라고 하는 것.. 그니까.. 버몬트가 바로 주라는 걸 모르고 있다는 것 이외에 다른 것이 이 얘기 안에 있는건지.. 모르겠고요.
o. CPU케이스 얘기: 그냥 본체 케이스를 말하는 것이겠죠. 그 여자는 컴퓨터 본체 앞의 어떤 구멍을 동전 투입기로 착각하고 고정관념에서 매일 동전을 넣고서 컴퓨터를 켜다가 그게 아닌걸 알고 문의를 하려다가 개쪽을 먹을까봐 아무것도 아니라며 전화를 끊은것.. 으로 이해했는데.

전규창 (1998/10/13,9:35)

- vermont : 미국의 동북부의 주
- CPU case는 당연히 본체의 case를 말하는 것임. 아마도 공중전화 요금이
40cent인가보지?
- Bob 의 휴가 이야기 : "밥은 휴가 중입니다. 잠시 기다리시겠습니까?"
휴가 중이라고 이야기 해 놓고 평상시 처럼 잠시 기다리라고 한 것..